Spokane Shrinking Violet Society

I am so sorry I forgot to blog earlier! But does anyone really read these anyway? Well, maybe it was all meant to be because I just bought something really amazing and who better to tell than fellow Violets? Of course we all know the great Tiffany Patterson, and for those of you smart enough to see her first show at the Kolva Sullivan Gallery (still going on as we speak) than you know that you were in for a treat.

I hired Tiffany to do some artwork for me for another blog I write, and for those of you who don’t know she is the one responsible for some of the Violet’s artwork. Tonight she featured a narrative titled “Flutter” -a story about a girl lucky enough to find herself and a happy ending. I don’t want to give the whole story away in case anyone is heading there later.

It was really hard for me not to cry when I was there because the works are so beautiful, and they say so much. I couldn’t even afford it but I bought a few because I just couldn’t walk away from such wonderful art. And who better to support than a fellow Violet, right?

I’m posting some pictures here so you can see a little sample for yourself. I wish I could have bought the whole set, but it’s something to work for when I finally get a job. Here are some of the pictures and Tiffany if you read this- I’m so very proud of you. I can’t believe how amazing you are and how talented your work is.

You can click on each on to make it uber large. Enjoy!

Good morning everyone! The sun is not shining, the birds are not chirping and my lawn is almost a foot tall now. I will mow it (probably) today but first things first.

What are you doing with your three day weekend? I will be slaving away over papers and crying my eyes out because my man is moving to Boise for an internship. My lil sis and some friends are headed for Sasquatch, and other unfortunate souls are working.

Speaking of working, I have this overwhelming urge to talk about kindness. Yes, I watched Oprah’s last show and she said a few things that amazed me. Now, I didn’t coin this thought or be the first to share it, but I have always believed that we are simply energy- and when you boil it down to that it makes sense to be kind and compassionate to others. Oprah said that people should be responsible for their energy and then quoted Newton’s third law of motion which is easiest described as ‘every action has a reaction.’

I spent a lot of time thinking about this. There are a million ways to become self aware and positive, the hardest part is making the commitment and keeping the change in your heart at all times. Lately I’ve been practicing meditation and the hardest part so far has been the simple act of clearing my mind and breathing. Whenever I did, I would be disrupted by every little sound. See, the first time I went to meditation group it was at a church here in Spokane. The group was free and the time they met was perfect for my schedule. Just when I started to clear my mind I heard all these little coughs, people moving in their chairs and stomachs growling. Some one came in uber late and was wearing a nylon coat, so every time they moved it swished and swished. They never stopped moving. I was about to show stand up and freak out when I swear one of the monks read my mind and said; “Free yourself of judgement and judging others around you.” I snuck a quick peek at the noisy late person. It was an old man with a breathing tube, carrying a huge air tank.

I then declared myself an ass-holio.

We are humbled every day when we read about terrible tragedies and things we cannot control. But at what point does the humbled, new-found sense of gratitude saturate ourselves and stay? This is something I don’t have the answer to. I am still a beginner when it comes to centering and becoming the positive  being I strive to be. So, I am challenging you all to question those negative voices in your head. Be kind to everyone, especially those who are rude to you. Be quiet. Listen and learn. Be true, be real and respect yourself and others.

I know I’ve been very touchy feel-y lately, but I think it’s important to share knowledge with others. Every day I am going to check myself at random times of the day and ask myself about how I’m expending my energy and what sort of message I’m sending and how it can be more positive. I hope you feel inspired to do the same.

I grew up in nature. Countless times our family would load egg salad sandwiches and guns into our old Dodge and head for the woods. The second the maple wind hit my face I was humbly silenced and grateful for this sense of escape. The outdoors promised mystery and release as I’ve never known or  come to know. Still I feel myself reaching under the rushing water and lifting cool rocks hoping to catch a crawdad. Even lying next to the reeds trying to spot a small frog, wanting to snatch it in my gentle hands and raise it up into the sun for a closer look.

It’s these things I think about when times are uncertain. Just recently I set out to de stress and come to some sort of new realization about all of the things going on in my life. Seems so much has changed over the last year, and for some those changes have included gaining or losing their dream jobs, houses, everything.

When I began walking towards the woods I have to admit I no longer felt comfort. I felt something closer to fear as I kept looking around me for strange people and swatting incessantly around my head whenever I thought I heard a wasp. It was almost as if I had lost my sense of adventure. I am always hearing the ever popular; “Take the time to smell the roses,” but I wonder what happens when one forgets how. Maybe I always loved the mystery of life, but as an adult it can be too much. Now, mysteries are real and possible. I mean, there might be someone dangerous in the woods. Unlikely, but plausible. Even more likely, I might get stung and shriek so loud all wildlife runs for the hills. And if either of these things were to happen, I’d be alone and exposed. My mom isn’t going to give me a bandaid and kiss and my dad isn’t going to whip out his .38 and shoot some stranger. It’s up to me. Thinking about this, I decided to meditate (or try to) and gain some perspective. With finals, internships, job prospects and everything else looming, maybe I should take a second out for me. Something to remind myself to stop and be grateful for all I have and the possibility that maybe more or maybe nothing would come my way in the future, and to ultimately accept that.

I tried sitting down on a log by a rushing brook. I smiled when I remembered the smallest of gifts: how the lily and lichen actually grow in their half drowned state. A beautiful wild turkey poked its head out at me. The sun felt warm on my back and the water, so cool in its comfort.

Of course, I wasn’t able to master meditation that day. I am working on it. And I have a wonderful friend who created a group on facebook for those of us searching for more relaxed, meaningful lives. I always liked to tell myself that there is solace in the ongoing certainty of things. Although that is true, it seems to me there is no harm with wanting to know if your dreams will come true.

I apologize if I see too poetic today, maybe even a little cryptic. But I have to believe there are many people out there working at jobs they hate and waiting for the big break. I know some people have lost so much and then there are those about to graduate that have no idea what is waiting for them here in the real world. I personally can’t stand to hear the words “In this tough economy…” one more time or I will wig out. But the simplest things made me remember that the fight is always worth it. Applying for job after job is just like swimming upstream- which does suck- but in the end you have killer abs and say you fought the good fight.

It’s beautiful out there, isn’t it? I’m going to force my man to go on a nature hike with me later. So if you do hear a resounding shriek today, it’s him complaining. I just couldn’t think of anything else to talk about today other than to remind all of those who are struggling to go out there and kick some ass. Don’t forget how to smell those roses.

Well, that was to get your attention. I have a bunch of reasons but to type 1,000 of them would require thesis like work. Yes, it is snowing today and who could be happy about snow that doesn’t stick but stays long enough to make you want to flip mother nature the bird! My poor seedlings are never going to feel the freedom of wild earth beneath their roots. They just keep straining toward the window saying; “Dude. It’s time to let us go outside!” I wonder what other gardeners are doing, because it’s just too early to put them outside. Hmmm…

Anyway, back to why I love Spokane. My friend Mariah has this awesome blog and site dedicated to this very subject and before I moved here I would read it and think, “This chick is crazy! Spokane is gross.” But I’ve changed my mind. When I drive or walk downtown, I look up at the highrises and wonder what those vintage apartments above look like inside. It must be awesome. When I preformed at the Bing Crosby theatre a few weeks ago, I was more excited to be surrounded by the stunning architecture than I was to be singing the blues, and that’s never happened to me before!

I remember the first time I walked by the Peaceful Valley area and crossed the bridge over the river. I saw a HUGE pile of trash/random stuff and  I thought, “Here we go again, why can’t people clean their stuff up? This isn’t a dump!” Then I see a whole herd of people wearing the same shirts and it dawns on me that what’s going on is a river cleanup! Who’d a thunk it?

Then, whenever I’m driving I come across tons of little businesses that rock. Like Wolffys. Best burgers ever! And there’s this place on Monroe called the Waffle House or something like that. There’s all these little pockets of surprise and always something amazing to do. I still haven’t been on the sky ride over the falls, I wish someone would tell me if that is cool or not because it seems like a death trap. But my point is there is always so much to do and although I can feel bad about Spokane’s hoarder houses and stupid graffiti people that just spray paint tags and not cool art, there is so many more people wanting to bring change and beauty to our area! And by the way, on the corner of Browne and Main there is a vintage Sprite advertisement that someone defaced with stupid black spraypaint and although I consider myself a lady, I hope I never run into you because you deserve a beat-down and I’ll be the first in line.

I think the reason why people dismiss Spokane is that I know most people come here to go to the mall, their fav restaurant, and then go home. They don’t take the time to explore the area, get to know the locals and random streets. That’s the sad part! I was one of those: “Off to Northtown Mall, then Olive Garden and home again!” Now I’m thinking, what does Jenny at Carousel have today that I need to buy? And secretly I think the Olive Garden sucks although I fear no one will be my friend now that I’ve confessed it. I think Pizza Hut has better breadsticks for sure, I always lick off that seasoning stuff, it’s so delicious. But as far as Italian places go there is one next to The Onion downtown that is amazing. I don’t think it’s Luigis but I can’t find the name on google. The lasagna there makes Olive Garden seem like airplane food served by Southwest Airlines. And we have all read about the Southwest Airlines mice infestation! Gross.

So what am I off to do today? Go pick up a copy of my very first published article in Spokane-Coeur d’Alene Living Magazine, stop by Anemone, and on the way home my FAVORITE place: Carousel Vintage Clothing. On the way I will gaze at amazing homes from the early 1900′s and imagine I will own one some day. I just wanted to share that with you all, I just can’t imagine someone not loving Spokane.

Peace out.

Let me ask you this: Why is it that sometimes the hardest thing to believe in is yourself? Maybe some people have no qualms letting their freak flag fly but for others it’s just so hard?

The reason I bring this message to you today is because I wanted to remind everyone that all it takes is a little push to get out there and follow your dreams. How many of us have vowed to lose weight and then chow down and not exercise, forgetting to take care of our very important selves? How about neglecting to put yourself out there and take a chance? What excuses are you telling yourself?

The point is this: forget all that. Don’t beat yourself up for forgetting to believe in yourself.  Here is a funny story to remind you all that life is worth the heartache of trying.

About 4 years ago I decided that I was going to become perfect and work out and look amazing. I started going to yoga every day. It rocked. My bod was lookin hot, I felt saucy inside and I felt myself smiling for no reason at all. Then I got a cold, no big deal. Did I let that stop me from eating healthy and going to yoga? Hell no. Then on one fateful day after I had reached very close to my goal weight this happened. Recovering from my cold, I found myself  still kicking ass and taking names in yoga. You know that saying: “You’d betta recognize!” Well I was saying, “You’d betta namaste!” In class we were doing this one stretch with our legs up against the wall and I was feeling good. Perhaps a little too relaxed. I coughed and out came this fart that sounded like a fog horn.

First of all, who wouldn’t die from laughter about that? I almost did, but after apologizing and dying 1000 deaths from embarrassment, I left after the class and didn’t go back to the gym or yoga for quite some time. Now that I’m older, I think what a stupid thing! It was just a little rooty tooty fresh and fruity, no reason to get off the bandwagon.

There are so many reasons to not do something, to give up, and make excuses. So what if you fail? So what if you fart? Who doesn’t fail or fart in life? So maybe this is a little hopeful and touchy feely message for you. I just wanted to tell you that life is worth the risks!

That’s all I have to say today, I hope you think about it.